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Oh glorious day! CBS has finally revealed the cast for Big Brother 10, and as expected, it's quite the diverse group. Sure, there are plenty of pretty people and bartenders, er, "mixologists," but we've also got one gay cowboy, one seventy-five year-old great grandpa, a sassy fiftysomething woman, an OCD sufferer, TWO black people (a Big Brother rarity), and a delightful mix of ardent conservatives and unabashed liberals. And best of all, they're all complete strangers. This looks promising. Very, very promising.
So in the grand tradition of making flash impressions on reality shows, I've taken every photo (and parts of their bios) and tried to assign personalities to each cast member, knowing full well that I could be completely wrong. But hey, that's part of the pre-season fun. Pics after the jump...
BRIAN: "I'm sorry, I can't hear you. As you can tell by my hair, I seem to be in the midst of a violent wind storm."
ANGIE: "I'm a total tomboy. Can't you tell? I mean, look at this hairstyle and this top. I'm like a man."
MEMPHIS: "I'm so very plain."
APRIL: "I'm sorry, honey. I'm not listening to a WORD you're saying."
OLLIE: "Hi! I don't drink, smoke, or curse, but I'll be more than happy to preach to you all season (and then undermine my words with hypocritical actions)."
MICHELLE: "My name's Michelle, and I work at REMAX, the wicked best real estate company in the Patriot Nation. Don't stare at me like that. Who do you think you aahh? Tawm Brady? 'Cause you look like a wicked faw leaf clovah with that kissah. I'm gonna beat you into a chowdah."
JERRY: "This isn't the DMV, is it?"
STEVEN: "Not only am I a member of the Gay Rodeo, I'm also a member of the Gay Goofy Smile Club too.
RENNY: "My name is Renny, I sing cabaret, I put feathers in my wigs, and I cry myself to sleep. Now excuse me while I reenact Liza Minelli: Live From Radio City Hall. Hit it, boys!"
DAN: "I don't think women are equal. But that's just me speaking, and I'm an IDIOT."
LIBRA: "So seriously, when do I get to meet Oprah?"
KEESHA: "Hi there, I'm Keesha, and I am having a ball! Seriously, so great to meet you! This is so much fun, right? Right? It's the best choice I ever made in my life! I'm so happy that I JUST WANT TO STRANGLE YOU AND STAB YOU IN YOUR SLEEP! I'm sorry. That came out wrong. Seriously, this is great!"
JESSIE: "Yo. You'll probably forget about me."
Hey, Ina Garten. What are your thoughts on the new cast?
INDEED.
What do you think?
10 Glorious Comments
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LOL. I think you've got them nailed.
Yeesh, another April. Let's hope to Rob, that she is nothing like the last. I couldn't take it again.
have you seen the video of the decade themed house? of course the HOH room sucks and the backyard looks the same...but the bedrooms and the kitchen are a lolfest. i personally love the 80s themed room and the kitchen
When I saw the 50's kitchen I thought - how long after he sees the fridge before Jerry tells us he had one "just like it growing up".
hb
Growing UP!
More like when he was first married.
I for one cannot wait to get this underway.
Maybe I am missing it on CBS
but there doesn't seem to be too much hype about this season.
Ha. Michelle is already my favorite.
Ha mine too.
Mine too! Unless she's not like you said!?! If she's like WAMBER I'm gonna hurl.
HONESTLY, if she's not like you said B-Side, I may consider legal action. What does "legal" mean?
Brian is C U T E!
I hope that Jerry is like Rudy from Survivor.
I am so excited after seeing this..I wondered about Jerry but I think I want him for my grandpa-he volunteers at an animal rescue and takes care of his ailing wife. Love. I also love that April uis OCD and listed bowling and having sex as two of her hobbies. There's something crazy about her, just a little bit, it looks promising..I can't wait to see her cry and call us all pieces of sh*t!!
I've known Bryan (Black Person #1) since we were 16. We ran track together in high school and were both athletes at the same college... In real life he actually practices what he preaches. But we all know that "reality tv" isn't actually "real life". Here's hoping he does the hometown good.
P.S. B side, I've had a massive crush on you via your writing since forever. And yes, that's the technical measure of time.