Most parachuters like to land on grass. Some, however, like to touch down ON TOP OF A MILITARY BAND. That's right. Yesterday, during some sort of military event, a skydiver descended from on high and unfortunately landed amidst the brass section of one very unlucky marching band. To be fair, the guy didn't intend to ambush this unsuspecting musical platoon, but somewhere along the way, he drifted off course, thus turning what was supposed to be a charming afternoon of John Philip Sousa into a horrifying recreation of 'Nam. Luckily, no one was seriously injured, but two tubas appear to be headed towards honorable discharge as they've since become mangled in the wake of this airborne assault.
So take that as a lesson, intrepid marching bands. Next time you're ready to engage in some good ol' fashioned "Stars and Stripes Forever," remember to look into the skies. You never know when an errant skydiver will make you his next victim.
Oh, and in other skydiving news, NPR has this to report: "And, in upstate New York, Scott Listemann is looking for his artificial limb after it flew off as he was skydiving." So there's that too.
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Minding my business here in upstate NY and WHAM! I get slammed by an artificial limb. Outta nowhere, I tell ya. That is so totally bizarre and not the most pleasant of possibilities.