ADVENTURES IN DOMESTICITY: Chocolate Cheesecake Edition

By B-Side in

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Last week, I brought you tales of Franco-Mexican fusion with my controversial brie quesadillas (with corn tortillas). Many close-minded people were shocked at the combination, and while not everyone can be as adventurous as I, surely there won't be as much of a massive outcry about my chocolate cheesecake, which has been a tried and true stalwart for years. Let me preface this by saying that I'm rather bad when it comes to baking and similar tasks of that ilk. However, since cheesecake requires little more than mixing a bunch of wet things in a bowl, it's something that I can pull off rather effortlessly. I've made this cake dozens of times, and what it lacks in presentation, it makes up for in taste. It's seriously really good.

Recipe after the jump!

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Here's a slice of the cheesecake. It was very good, if I do say so myself.


The cheesecake is actually very simple (if I can do it, so can you. Unless, of course, you're a HUGE idiot). Here are the ingredients, listed Ina Garten style:


• 8 oz (1 block) of GOOD cream cheese. You can also use the 1/3 less fat variety, and it tastes the same.

• 1/3 cup of GOOD sugar.

• 2 GOOD eggs.

• 6 oz of GOOD semi-sweet chocolate chips.

• 8 oz (one average-sized container) of GOOD vanilla yogurt.

• 1 teaspoon of GOOD vanilla extract.

(For the crust, you can make your own using the standard blend of graham crackers, butter, and sugar, but I'm perpetually lazy and just buy it at the store.)

Anyway, you should probably have all your ingredients at room temperature so they blend nicely. Sometimes I don't prepare ahead of time and just mix the stuff straight out of the fridge. This causes little white specks in the batter and ultimately the cake, but it tastes the same (you can just tell your guests that it's white chocolate. Heh.)

Nevertheless, preheat the oven to 350°.

Next, mix the cream cheese in a bowl with the sugar. I suppose you can use a mixer, but I'm not privy to such fancy technology; so I just use a fork and some elbow grease. Or at least, an elbow (I refuse to grease my limbs).

Once the cream cheese and sugar has blended nicely, add the two eggs and beat it all together. Again, a mixer would probably make this process faster and easier, but it's nothing an old fashioned whisk can't take care of.

Melt the chocolate chips. I don't care how you do it: double boiler, microwave, sunshine — it's your life. Go crazy. You can also add butter or margarine to the chocolate, but I don't find it's necessary.

Mix the melted chocolate into the batter. Marvel as the pale yellow mixture turns dark brown.

Add the vanilla yogurt. Then add the vanilla extract. And then stir like your life depends on it. Or at least until it's blended.

Pour the mixture into the pie crust which you've either made or bought, and then place the batter in the oven for 28 minutes. When you reach the 28 minute mark, check on the cheesecake. If the center still looks really wet (which is usually the case), let it go for another five minutes. The outer edges of the cheesecake my crack and look scary, but that's okay. It'll go away.

Take the cheesecake out and let cool for about 30 minutes on a rack. Then transfer it to the fridge and wait for it to set — at least two hours, probably three. That's about it. I'd say 20 minutes prep time, 33 minutes cook time, and 3 hours cooling time. When it's ready, you'll get a tasty slice that looks like this:

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If this shot were 3-D, it would be awesome.


Good luck!

8 Glorious Comments

In Rachel Ray style "Yumo!" That looks delicious! I thought of you the other day when I needed some GOOD olive oil for a recipe.

Thanks for the recipe! It did look pretty fresh from the oven in the brie-a-dilla post, and I'm sure some magic could be done with GOOD whipped cream and GOOD shaved chocolate. (Or even crappy shaved chocolate.)

Maybe you could get dUGH to partner with you on marketing your line of 'fusion' delights.

I was one that ripped on your quesidillas. I don't feel the need to apologize about it, but I will still be on team B-Side for years to come.

One thing about the cheesecake. You've ruined me for the day. Here I am, stranded at work. No extra coin. No chocolate in sight.

I you read about a maniac slapping children to get their chocolate, you know who to blame.

I'm impressed that you made this from scratch. I thought it was a box mix. If you eliminate the chocolate (the horror!), is it just as good?

You're skills in the kitchen continue to amaze. Why someone hasn't snatched you up already I'll never know...

Should be "Your" not "You're"...yeah, I'm a dumbASS

would it kill you to use or make a GOOD crust?


and i'm surprised you didnt try and put any brie in THIS TOO

making a homemade crust with those chocolate wafer cookies is good too. I think you can even buy chocolate cookie pie crusts pre-made now right?

I swear, you cover all of the shows I love. Big Brother, The Hills, Project Runway, and now INA!!! The cheesecake looks absolutely delicious, and I love your emphasis on the GOOD. She say that for everything! 1)Not everyone lives in the Hamptons, INA. If I want to buy Cheap Tom's Imitation Vanilla I damn well will! 2) She says "good" mayonnaise all the time...I mean, seriously? It's eggs and oil, how much quality can we expect? Not to mention, she's clearly using Hellmanns, so...yeah.

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