I didn’t do a photocap of last week’s Real Housewives of Atlanta because the pics on Bravo’s site were kind of bad, but this time around, we have more material to work with. Plus, in its third episode, the ladies are starting to develop more as characters. We’ve got Nene, who’s just all around hilarious and entertaining. Then there’s Deshawn, who spends pretty much every episode complaining about how she simply does NOT have time for anything (hence her enormous staff). There’s Lisa, who comes off as the brightest of the bunch, at least business-wise (and let’s not overlook her husband Ed, who kind of seems like the best ever). And then there’s ShereÃƒÂ© (pronounced Sheray, not Sheree-ay or Sher-ay-ay as her strange accent aigu placement might suggest). ShereÃƒÂ© likes to think she’s the smartest of the gang, but really she just comes off seeming cold and mannish. Am I forgetting anyone? Oh yes. KIM. She should be awful, but she’s oddly likable. The only problem: she somehow maintains that she’s TWENTY-NINE.
Even better, she boasts that she looks pretty damn good for twenty-nine, which is patently false. Even if she were that age (which she simply cannot be), she looks terrible. I mean, she looks ten years older. Big Poppa better hire some stylists to come down to Atlanta and fix her up.
Speaking of stylists, I can’t help noticing that all these women spend an inordinate amount of time with their stylists, more so than the other housewives of New York and Orange County. I’m always wary of people whose best friends are their handlers. There’s something hollow about it (mostly in that these people are hired to hang onto them), and watching women do nothing but gab with their makeup artists or personal shoppers feels… sad. I’m looking at you, Sher-AY-AY.
Nevertheless, last night’s episode was fairly entertaining. Kim tried to launch a singing career, which seems instantly destined to fail (first clue Ã¢â‚¬â€ she never sings). Deshawn spearheaded a quest to raise a million dollars (um, no) for her foundation, which has the vague mission of improving self-esteem in girls Ã¢â‚¬â€ again, good luck with that fundraising. Nene learned that her dad might not be her dad (not that he really seemed to care). Lisa did nothing in particular beyond trading some barbs with her hubby. And ShereÃƒÂ© continued to make bold proclamations about herself in her pseudo Claire Huxtable voice. Good times all around.
“How many other twenty-nine year old girls can say they’ve got hips like Kathy Najimi? Pretty hot!”
“You thought I looked 42? You must be dyslexic and meaning 24. That’s hilarious. And thank you!”
“Okay, ladies. Here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to say something vague, you’ll respond with something specific, and then I’ll say ‘Yes, that’s what I was seeing,’ and then you’ll pay me $200. Deal?”
“Okay, girls. I know you have low self-esteem and all, but I just don’t have the TIME to help you all day. So let’s hold hands and get this over with, okay?”
“Ugh, I just don’t have time to look at these diamonds any longer. I’m practically a single mother!”
“Girl, you just GOT to come to this pageant. There’ll be so many drag queens. You’ll fit right in!”
“Wait a second, these are all men dressed like women? Why do they keep asking me to come on stage then?”
“Damn, can you believe it’s been less than thirty-six hours since our last gratuitous photo shoot? Girl, I could faint!”
“Excuse us, we’re being very modern.”
“Yes, yes. This is how large I’d like my breasts to be.”
“I’m very particular about my men. Mostly, they need to have an eight figure income and must be open to divorce.”
What did you think about the episode? Enjoying the series?