TRAGEDY ON 'THE HILLS': Ashes Is Missing!!

Horrifying news this week that one of our most beloved reality TV pets, Ashes from The Hills, has gone missing (and no, he hasn’t been hiding out on the floor). Apparently Lauren Conrad was bringing the cat into the house when a loud, passing car startled our feline friend. Ashes immediately jumped from the not-so-iron-clutches of LC and ran into the bushes, never to be seen again. Lauren said she looked around for him, but it was all in vain. Ashes had disappeared. Why, Ashes, why??? I’m sure the poor cat was genuinely startled by the asshole car, but part of me thinks it just didn’t want to be around Brody’s whining anymore. Sweet kitty freedom!!
Those who know cats know that Ashes could very well resurface a few weeks down the line; however, the scuttlebutt is that Lauren and Lo have up and sold their Hollywood casa, which means the likelihood that Ashes will be reunited with the girls is next to none. Luckily, there is a silver lining: I happen to live just a few blocks from Lauren’s old place. I’ll be sure to keep an eye out for Ashes, and if I find him, you can be sure you’ll here about it here first. It’s the least I could do after so relentlessly mocking Alessandra Ambrosio’s missing pup.
Thanks to reader Nicole for giving me the heads up. To hear Lauren’s interview where she spills the beans about Ashes, click here.