How I Survived Zico’s “Banging Body Bootcamp”

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I am not known generally as a “morning person,” unless, of course, being a morning person means being irritable, slow, and angry at said morning. That’s why when I was invited to a bootcamp this morning at 8 AM, sponsored by ZICO chilled juices, I was like hellllll no. Why on Earth would I voluntarily wake up at 7:30 AM only to have my ass kicked?

But then I saw that there’d be massages and manis afterwards, and suddenly, my outlook changed. Needless to say, I soon found myself bright-eyed and bushy-tailed on the rooftop of the Montalban Theater in Hollywood, slurping down ZICO smoothies and booty-shaking to celebrity trainer Jennifer “JJ Dancer” Johnson’s aggressive routines. Somehow, I survived. I apologize in advance to the janitorial crew that later had to mop up my puddle of sweat.

Anyway, it was all super fun, and for once I was doing something healthy instead of stuffing my face with food. Pics of this extravaganza after the jump…

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Here we are: ZICO bootcamp. Also of note: Overve, a terrifying new production starring what appears to be a homicidal, wooden puppet.

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Our rooftop exercise space, replete with complimentary (and complementary) yoga mats.

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A view of Downtown in the distance. I think my friend David works in the tall building to the right. I think he’s waving at us. Hi David!

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It’s a mat, mat, mat, mat world.

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The chain link fence and gray skies really go a long way to make Hollywood look super depressing.

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Let the fun begin! Turns out the bootcamp was more of a hip-hop dance class, which was great because that happens to be an area where I excel, as evidenced by this photo of me doing what I call “The Demented Flamingo.”

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This is the “I’m A Little Teapot Dome Scandal.”

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“The Gently Spasming Karate Kid.”
(Note that I appear to be 100% out of sync with the rest of the class.)

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“The Coy Marathoner.”
(Props to the girl all the way to the right who also appears to be living her truth, as they say).

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“The Touchdown of Confusion.”

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Our instructors appear to transcend gravity.

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Seriously, it’s like the rapture is happening up in here.

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#intense.

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Grace incarnate.

And now, video of my awesomeness:

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Not only do I sing, but I dance too! #ZICOchilled @ZICOcoconut

View on Instagram

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JJ and I striking a pose (with a ZICO smoothie sample, no less). We were fast friends. I think she was really impressed with my otherworldly dance style.

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Some casual pampering ensued.

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And now, a dog.

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Looks like we all had a great morning.

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