Have You Ever Seen A More Shifty-Eyed Dog?


Some poor person has lost their dog, and by all means, I don’t mean to mock that (last time I did that, it turned out I was targeting the missing pooch of Alessandra Ambrosio). However, I must call attention to this “Lost” sign. I don’t think I have ever — outside of a cartoon — seen such a shifty-eyed dog. Seriously, all that’s missing is a thin mustache, a top hat, and a monocle. Or is he more of an Old West outlaw? You know, the kind that shows up on faded, yellow Wanted posters for killing Deputy Angus over by Dead Man’s Bluff. Okay, I’m talking nonsense now. All I do know is that this dog is up to no good, and if I didn’t know better, I’d say he wasn’t “missing” but rather on the run, riding the rails up to Montana where he’ll start a new life as barkeep or the manager of a general store.

This owner should clearly be counting his or her blessings because I’m fairly certain Satan himself has possessed that little guy.

(Of course it could just be a terrible photo, and the dog is really an angel, and some poor person is totally distraught over the loss of his or her faithful friend. Either/or)

A closer pic of the dog after the jump… (trust me, it’s worth it)

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The ‘Real Housewives’ Head To The Volcano!


That pesky volcano in Iceland is at it again, and now that air travel has been severely impacted by yet another ash cloud, I couldn’t help but think back to a photo gallery of the first eruption that my friend jash had sent me. Browsing through the pictures, I realized it was time for another Housewives adventure, and so with no further ado, please enjoy the Real Housewives of Orange County, New York, Atlanta, and New Jersey taking it to the mountain…

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Inside the Nylon Young Hollywood Party


Nylon magazine held a party for “Young Hollywood” last night, and my friend Jenny and her friends managed to wrangle invites for themselves. Jenny got me on the list too, but by the time I got there, the fire marshall had shown up and shut down the line. This was a tragic setback for me and my celebrity sighting ambitions, but fear not, I did have two noteworthy run-ins. First, as I mentioned in my City photocap, I walked right by Whitney Port, who looked stunning — no exaggeration. Less glamorous but still worthy of my excitement was my second “star”: Robyn from Kell on Earth. She was actually working the door, and I must admit I felt a sense of trepidation as I approached her. I thought she was going to just throw me out of the Roosevelt Hotel (and then complain that I hadn’t filed something properly). My interaction with her was fine though, and she merely redirected me to a table outside for check-in (which, sadly, never happened thanks to the pesky fire marshall).

Well, I missed out, but Jenny got into the party, and she brought along her little Pink Toy Phone. I capitalize the letters because Jenny and her friends have launched a little Facebook community devoted to this “phone,” which in actuality is just a trinket from McDonald’s. The deal with the Pink Toy Phone is that Jenny and her friends bring it to cool places (usually in Hollywood) and take pictures of it with various people, celebrities, or who knows what. Just think of it as Flat Stanley, except not flat and much gayer.

Nevertheless, Jenny certainly got a few choice pics of the phone with various luminaries (mostly from The Hills). Her pics — with and without the phone — after the jump. Continue reading

Pics From Inside the 'Reality Matters' Party


For those of you reading this blog or following my Twitter, you know I’ve been shilling Reality Matters, the reality TV anthology that I have contributed to. Well, last night, there was a party at Les Deux for the book, and so of course I showed up all ready to preen around for the press and whatnot. Turns out the press didn’t really care about me, but just because my ego had been trampled and raped and left for dead didn’t mean I couldn’t have a fantastic time. After all, there were reality-stars aplenty there. I busted out my camera and took photos with as many as I could (although, quite frankly, I missed the majority of them like Trishelle and Charlie O’Connell and a handful of others).

After the jump, check out my pics from the evening. Fun times had by all!

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HALLOWEEN 2009: More Goofy Pictures Than One Can Imagine


There’s nothing quite like Halloween on a Saturday, especially in West Hollywood, CA, where over 500,000 people convene to show off their costumes and check out everyone else’s in what usually proves to be the people watching event of the year. And as you all know, if there’s anything I love, it’s people watching. In 2008, I got all arts & crafty and built a Price Is Right costume that I was sure would wow the masses. It was certainly well received, but I must confess that it really didn’t elicit the rapturous response I was really going for. And yes, I’m very shallow about these things. I won’t mince words: I wanted attention.
This time around, I decided I’d go with a sure-fire strategy. If I wanted my costume to be a rousing success, I’d have to a) walk around in as little clothes as possible, or b) engage in some ’80s nostalgia. Guess which option won out? A few trips to some thrift stores later (not to mention Michael’s in Burbank and a wig shop in Hollywood), and I had all the essential items needed to make my very own Zack Morris costume. Cheap ’80s nostalgia, here I come!
Warning — somewhat NSFW. Buttocks, bare chests, and tranny areolas (not in that order) after the jump…

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GAH! Sandra Lee Provides Startling Image To My Innocent Eyes


So about five minutes ago, I turned on my TV, and as is wont to happen, I heard the audio first for about three seconds before the video came through. Almost immediately, I recognized the distinct singsong timber of Sandra Lee’s voice as she assured the viewing audience that “this couldn’t be any easier because THIS is a MICROWAVE dip!” Oh lord. What horrors awaited me?
Sure enough, the image came through, and I nearly jumped back in horror as Sandra stood there in full wicked witch regalia. Crazy costumes are nothing new for this wacky lady, but it was entirely way too jarring for me to handle. Of course, a morbid fascination then overtook me, and I rewound to the top of the episode to see what horrendous Halloween treats she’d be making.
A truly disgusting image after the jump.

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OPEN POLL: Who Intimidates Better?


A curious thought ran through my head today as I glanced at an image of Bea Arthur: who does the “OH REALLY?” face to better effect? Cindy McCain or Dorothy Zbornack? Cindy was the previous champion, but next to Dorothy, she looks almost pleasant. Then again, that glimmer of a smile also suggests a deep, icy evilness whereas Dorothy’s just looks pissed.