Next week, most Americans will be gathered around a table of some sort to celebrate Thanksgiving, and by “celebrate,” I mean stuff their faces until a button or four pops off any variety of shirt, pants, blouse, or skort. And when it comes to gut-busting food, no one does it better than Ina Garten. That’s why it was only logical that my clique would convene yet again for our third Barefoot Contessa potluck night, this time in honor of Thanksgiving. Yes, we assembled a small pre-Thanksgiving Thanksigiving and enjoyed some of Ina’s best seasonal offerings. On the menu: turkey, stuffing, veggies, salad, pumpkin stuff, dip, and, of course, booze. How bad can that be?
If you’re looking for inspiration for next week’s big feast, you’ve come to the right place. Check out our Mayflower celebration — replete with a real life American Indian! — after the jump…
(additional pictures by jash — ie. the ones that clearly came from a better camera)
So about five minutes ago, I turned on my TV, and as is wont to happen, I heard the audio first for about three seconds before the video came through. Almost immediately, I recognized the distinct singsong timber of Sandra Lee’s voice as she assured the viewing audience that “this couldn’t be any easier because THIS is a MICROWAVE dip!” Oh lord. What horrors awaited me?
Sure enough, the image came through, and I nearly jumped back in horror as Sandra stood there in full wicked witch regalia. Crazy costumes are nothing new for this wacky lady, but it was entirely way too jarring for me to handle. Of course, a morbid fascination then overtook me, and I rewound to the top of the episode to see what horrendous Halloween treats she’d be making.
A truly disgusting image after the jump.
Back in August, some of my posse convened at a friend’s house to have an Ina Garten / Barefoot Contessa potluck dinner party. The results were excellent, and if memory serves me correctly (and it does), I practically had to be wheeled out of the house as all the food was so incredibly delicious that I simply could not restrain from eating it, despite physical limitations of my stomach. It didn’t help that I gorged myself on hors d’oeuvres, and let’s not talk about how rich all the food was. My gluttony be damned, the entire dinner went off without a hitch. Tasty, easy, fun â€”Â how could we not do it again.
And so we all reconvened this weekend, but things did not go as smoothly. There was smoke. There was fire. There were broken pans. And there was dog vomit. It all led up to one question: could Ina’s food survive such adverse conditions? The results after the jump.
Sandra Lee certainly makes a lot of repulsive things, but her crowning achievements usually lie in the realm of dessert where her tacky confections often yield horrified faces across America. Well, conveniently, a blogger has compiled the top ten worst Sandra Lee desserts, and the list is a real doozy. Anyone who has followed Sandra Lee either here or elsewhere on the internet will not be surprised by the number one offending dish, but that doesn’t make it any less fun. Definitely check it out.
Denver Westword: Sandra Lee’s ten worst dessert disasters (thanks sisofjash)
What happens when six people put together an Ina Garten-themed potluck dinner on a Sunday night? They all roll away feeling like they never want to eat again for the rest of their lives. And that’s a good thing. Yes, last Sunday, a few of my friends and I put on a Barefoot Contessa dinner party, and the results were stunning. Each one of us brought at least one dish, and I’ll tell you right now, there was enough food to feed a small army (assuming one would want that small army to then be sluggish, moaning, and occasionally be prone to reiterating “THAT WAS SO GOOD”). Here’s how it broke down: our hosts, Greg and Andrea, were in charge of the main course; Sly took on dessert; Jash was appetizers; Malibu Judie was cocktails; and I provided the side. Together, we formed a Voltron of culinary bliss, helped â€” no doubt â€” by the presence of GOOD ingredients.
Pictures of all that we created after the jump…
The Next Food Network Star upped its game last night by forcing its final three contestants to whip up a luxurious, “ultimate” three course dinner party for an imposing table of Food Network stars and celebrity chefs. It was a fairly daunting task, and while all three did a fine job, only two could move on. For the sake of ruining it for people on DVR delay, I’ll refrain from saying anything more, but after the jump, I will weigh in with an opinion or two…
Last night, the cabal of judges known as Bob, Susie, and Bobby whittled the field of contestants on The Next Food Network Star down to just five potential superstars, and now that we’re more than halfway through the show’s run, I thought I’d check back in and see how our stars are progressing. Do we have a star in the making? Or is this season going to be a bust? Thoughts and ideas after the jump…
Yesterday, I received a new dutch oven (technically a risotto pot), and in honor of this new, formidable piece of equipment, I knew I just had to braise something. But what? Well, I turned on the television, and there was Tyler Florence whipping up a pot roast. I wouldn’t say that it’s my favorite meal of all time, but there was a certain element of kismet that I couldn’t deny in watching TAHLAH (as I’ve called him ever since an old Asian woman on his show yelled out his name in similar fashion). Anyway, I went off to the store, bought a two pound chuck roast, some veggies, and got to work.
The results? Well, they’re after the break.
Sometime last week, while I was procrastinating from my writing, I came across a fateful piece of information: Ina Garten, star of The Barefoot Contessa, would be doing a book signing here in the Los Angeles. In general, I’m not much of a book signing person, but I knew I this was one event I had to attend. When the day came, I hopped in my car, braved my way over to the yuppie-tastic West Side, and stood in line for two hours, all in the pursuit of a GOOD picture and autograph. The adventure, including two surprising celebrity cameos, after the jump.