JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: The Situation Caught That Bitch


It was a return to the Ron and Sam show on last night’s Jersey Shore. For three-quarters of the episode, everything was fine and dandy between the two idiots; although, clearly drama was on the horizon — and I’m not just saying that because I saw the previews. The two slowly began to fall into old ways as they smooched drunkenly in a club. So much for Sammi’s independence. To her credit, she did push Ronnie away, but ever so slightly. Plus, she let the old crazy seep back into the dialogue when she harangued him for not chasing after her when she went home. Okay you crazy bitch, stop trying to convince us you’re independent when you say dumb stuff like that. It completely devalues her entire epiphany. After all, the reason she went home was supposedly to build herself up, but now we see it was merely a ploy to make Ronnie chase after her. Oh these women in abusive relationships — I realize they are damaged goods, but they are oh so frustrating too. Continue reading

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: Thank Goodness MTV Doesn’t Broadcast in Smell-O-Vision


Oh snap! I just realized it’s Thursday, and I hadn’t done my Jersey Shore photocap from last week yet! I blame this squarely on the barista competition I judged which not only put me behind schedule, but also had me in a world of hurt last Thursday night. It’s like I blocked out any and all TV I watched that evening. Fear not: I will not forget this fine, fine program — one of the best on TV, I’d say. Yes, all you pop culture snobs may turn your nose up at the Seaside Heights antics, but Jersey Shore is wonderful, and I wholeheartedly back Rolling Stone’s decision to plop Snooki on its cover.

But I digress. This week’s episode was a rather drama-free experience. Ronnie spent the entire time trailing Sammi around like a puppy-dog, and of course it worked because by the end, Sammi was singing his praises once again. That’s all fine and good, but if she goes back to the big oaf, she’s an idiot (but what else is new?). We also learned that Snooki has a major crush on Vinny, or at least his manhood, and Deena is a terrible driver. No surprise there.

As for the toilet situation, the kids finally hired a plumber to clean their pipes, and a shocking discovery was made: the offending object clogging the toilet was apparently Vinny’s drawers. Someone, possibly Vinny but probably not, had flushed his undies down the drain. I blame either Snooki (acting out in a jealous rage) or one of the nameless lady-friends who parade through the house.

Also enduring a stinky fate was The Situation, who kicked a girl out of bed because she smelled too much like cheese. Unfortunately for him, it wasn’t the girl’s fault. Turns out Sammi, Snooki, and Ronnie had pranked Mike by sprinkling and smearing all sorts of fine cheeses on his mattress. Kind of gross, kind of hilarious. Anyway, on to the photocap… Continue reading

JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: The Calm Before The Storm?


This week’s episode of Jersey Shore was a fairly low-key event. There was no fighting, no significant cockblocking, no noteworthy smooshing, no drunken foolishness. Just our favorite over-tanned buddies hanging out and having a good time. As a result, the installment veered on the boring side, but I gotta admit that I enjoyed the laziness of it all. Kind of reminded me of summer with my friends. Of course, the sad part is that I’ve started to identify these kids as my friends. Their inside-jokes become my inside-jokes; their dramas become my dramas; and their STDs, well, they get to keep those. Continue reading



After the craziness of last week’s Jersey Shore, this latest episode was tame in comparison. Nothing really happened, and what did happen involved people crying in self-pity. I swear the entire episode could have been scored with a wallowing violin. In some ways I enjoyed all the teary madness, mainly because the producers clearly were chuckling to themselves the entire time. When Ronnie stepped into the bathroom at work so he could cry, we didn’t hear dramatic “sad” music. No, we heard mocking silly music — the closest equivalent to Survivor’s “bongos of idiocy.” It all underscored a very important point: Jersey Shore never has and never will take itself seriously, and that’s why its appeal has remained so strong. Funny how when this show first premiered, I decried the sloppy editing and production values. Now I see its brilliance. Funny how things change. (Either that or I’ve simply been dumbed down).

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Coming off last Monday’s wonderfully goofy Jersey Shore that featured Snooki face planting into the sands of Seaside Heights, it was inevitable that we’d be due for a less interesting follow-up episode. Indeed, Thursday’s latest installment was a touch forgettable, even if it was still immensely entertaining. The action began with Snooki locked up in jail — a predicament that lasted all of about thirty seconds of airtime. Soon she was sent barreling out of the drunk tank where she was received in open arms by her roommates. I don’t remember if Deena had stopped bawling or not at that point, but it’s safe to say that the so-called walking holiday was certainly not expressing Christmas cheer.

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JERSEY SHORE PHOTOCAP: In Search of a Mind Condom (Ribbed, For Our Pleasure)


I am so FRIGGIN behind on my Jersey Shore photocaps that I decided to just scrap the first two and start with coverage of last night’s third episode (or rather, the sixteenth episode of season two, which we’re still in). In case you haven’t been following, the gang has relocated back to Seaside Heights, and holy crap, the show is still amazing. In some ways, it’s actually getting better. Miami was surprisingly enjoyable — we all thought the magic would be gone now that the cast had become bona fide media celebrities. However, as fun as Miami was, the show really seems to work best in Jersey. On the home turf, the kids come alive. Of course, on the home turf, the kids are also mega superstars, which is why nearly every exterior shot features literally crowds of people in the background, clearly cordoned off from the action by producers. It kind of drains some of the magic from it all, but that’s okay. There’s still plenty of silliness to go around, and most of it was on display last night, which was certainly the best episode of the new “season.”

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Ep. 13: Banter With Ben and Lisa

We’re baaaaaack. After a two month hiatus, Lisa and I have convened once again to podcast, and this time around, the fun took place in my kitchen. Yes, while I made a dish for a dinner party, Lisa and I bantered away, discussing everything from vampires to zombies to Jersey Shore to German vocab. We’re pledging to podcast more frequently, and with any luck, we’ll actually follow through!

After the jump, check out the recipe that I used during the podcast, and remember, you can subscribe to the podcast on iTunes for free! Click here.


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Hot New Fashion Trends from ‘Jersey Shore’


It’s the new year, and with a new year comes new trends. Thankfully we have the cast of Jersey Shore to clue us in to the new looks for 2011. After the jump, check out the sweet duds and fashion statements that J-WOWW, Snooki, and the others all made at the MTV New Year’s Eve bash.

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AND WHATNOT: Tempers Flare on ‘The View;’ Also, T.I. Is A Hero, Dessert Darling Blows Up, and The Hottest Spots in DTLA

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