Recently in America's Next Top Model Category

Behold the Tyra Banks school of facial dexterity. You can just barely hear her scolding an ingenue for doing "this" [goofy smile, fluttering eyelids] and not "this" [pursed lips, narrow eyes]. To Tyra's credit though, only she could pull off this silly collection of smiles with such a gigantic mane of hair.

For more insights into the world of Tyra, be sure to read the New York Times Magazine article here.

UPDATE: For an amazing video of Tyra showing off her smiles, click here. (Only the first two minutes pertain to smiling, the rest is just Tyra-talk)

Back in Cycle 9 of America's Next Top Model, we watched the girls stumble and slur their way through one of the most ill-conceived product titles of all time: the Wetslicks Fruit Spritzer. To the uninitiated (ie. me), it sounded like the models were merely saying "westshlicksfritzsprtizer," especially when queen marble-mouth Jaslene got in on the action. Now CoverGirl is back with yet another tongue twister of a product name, and sure enough, Fatima, Whitney, and Anya all managed to completely botch it, reducing the brand to a mishmash of syllables that sounded not unlike "blashtlashtlashblahsshsblashssplash." I don't blame the girls. I blame whoever came up with the stupid tagline.

Nevertheless, I'm not even going to say what this product is called because trying to guess the words is half the fun.

Tyra Banks reached new levels of ridiculousness on last night's America's Next Top Model, and as I watched her "sprain her ankle," I couldn't help wondering if she had stolen some moves from Ben Stiller when he played a certain magician on Arrested Development. Above, Tyra doing her thing. After the jump, two Tony Wonder clips.

Two days ago, my boring old trip to the frozen yogurt shop was made considerably more amusing and bizarre with the sudden appearance of a dairy-hoarding, jalopy-driving Faye Dunaway. The entire experience was so strange that I couldn't help but to blog all about it. Then again, I blog about lint I find in my belly button; so I suppose it's not so surprising that I immediately ran back to my keyboard to detail the event. But I digress (as usual).

Well, I returned to the fateful yogurt shop tonight after a spicy Thai dinner mandated the sort of cold relief that only a healthy serving of frozen yogurt (or ice cream, really) could provide. Little did I realize that my return to Angelina Yogurt would yield another star sighting with equally noteworthy behavior. Of course, I use the term "star" in its loosest possible way. I'm talking about a reality star, and a long since forgotten one at that. But hey, a name is a name, and even if she was just a normal person, her etiquette deserved to be broadcast to the world anyway.